Latvians have this quirky little habit of overselling everything that is Latvian. Everything from the crumbling charms of Kalnciema Kvartals, to the ramshackle one-horse town that is Pavilosta, has been described to me as “stunning”.
Stunning
Actually, it’s probably advisable not to tell Latvians where you’re going ahead of time – they’ll get your expectations up far too much over something that is probably “fine” or “nice”, at best. A Swedish friend of mine recently suggested adding “for Latvia” to the end of every sentence to keep excitement suitably dampened.
Sven: How’s your curry?
Me: Yeah, it’s pretty good – for Latvia.
*
Sven: How was the service?
Me: Yeah, it was pretty good – for Latvia.
See what I did there?
However, nothing or nobody is guilty of overselling Latvia more than the Facebook page, If you like Latvia, Latvia likes you, the implication being , of course, that if you don’t like Latvia, or dare to point out a couple of things that bug you, Latvia will hang, draw and quarter you, then feed your shredded remains to the gangs of feral cats that roam the streets of Riga.
“I hear Irish bitches are tasty…”
Now I get that it’s a government-sponsored page so they have to do their best at promoting the modest charms of Latvia, but this site is so saccharine-soaked and overly-optimistic that it almost gives me a seizure every time I look at it – sort of like a Latvian David Brent, on crack. Deivids Brants…
Here are a few little gems I just had to share. (I like it when other people suffer with me.)
Summer in Latvia is something truly unique. You can experience everything possibly imaginable – from rapid rivers and deep green forests, to vivid cornfields all over the country. (Twitches.)
We like to say that the journey is more important than the destination (except when your destination is Latvia, of course). This is exactly why there are so many ways to unravel the amazing sights of this wonderful country of ours. (Grinds teeth.)
Have you heard about the Versailles of Latvia? We’re talking about the Rundāle Palace, of course. The 18th-century Baroque palace recently celebrated the completion of 50 years of renovation work. A truly magnificent site, it can undoubtedly be called the Versailles of not only Latvia, but the whole of Northern Europe. (Sniggers.)
Amazing, beautiful, gorgeous, welcoming and only 813 years old? Yes, your guess is correct – it’s the breathtaking city of Riga. (Keels over, clawing at eyes…)
There’s a thing we can say for sure – we, Latvians, really love our wildlife. From amazing lakes and forests to astonishing butterflies in all colours and sizes. (Silently weeps.)
Don’t get me wrong – there is some useful information on the site, and of course there are plenty of places in Latvia worth visiting. There’s just something about the peppy, super happy-clappy (frankly, very unLatvian), almost cult-like style of delivery that gets on my wick. It also results in readers getting dangerously over-excited:
Dude, put the Kool-Aid down…
If my blog can be accused of being overly negative realistic, then this site is definitely the antidote you’ve been looking for. In fact, it’s pretty good – for Latvia.
The amazing, fabulous, beautiful, gorgeous, stunning, breath-taking Rundale Palace
Expat Eye on Latvia 
Poor Irish Jane!!! I am so sorry that you never met normal Latvian men and that your “visit” in this crap-country have turned out so bad. Shame, that something kept you here for umm 4 years??? Poor, poor you… at least you are in a better place now, the great and civilized Germany! But I’m sure that it’s not half as hood as your own beautiful super-green island, only full of Latvian trash, thanks god they are over there, we sure don’t need them here..
Crikey, way to prove the point of the post!
Wasn’t it just 😉
Poor highly-sensitive Latvian 😉
There’s something higly-sensitive between your legs
Just when I thought I couldn’t be any happier to be out of Latvia, you come along. And the word that you’re dancing around is ‘cunt’ – it’s a good word. It works on a number of levels.
There’s something higly-sensitive between your legs
I don’t think there are many people who don’t have anything highly-sensitive between their legs. Are you one of them (I can’t imagine, why point out this fact otherwise), by chance? Bless you, my dear!
Or are you a full-grown ninny with the wit of a kindergartener proudly declaring: ‘you’ve got a hoo-haa-wee-wee there! Ha! I’m right and you’re a poopy-head!’?
I actually wouldn’t agree that Latvians (non-ethnic) are inordinately crazy about everything (or anything) here. I know that you’ve been here for a long time, but I somehow suspect that you’ve been subjected to a lot of people simply turning their tourist faces to you.
As to the orgasmic nature of some of the text on that facebook page – I’d say it’s fine. You’re right: it’s these people’s job, and there’s obviously the necessity to promote the country for whatever it’s got – and sometimes you have to push it.
The thing is, you’re not the target audience for these texts (and neither am I, or anyone in sound mental health who’s lived here long enough), so obviously it’s not hard to point out the bollocks in all of this. I, too, could spend the day sneering about the news, say, of the new National Library building opening: ‘the new building of the National Library of Latvia symbolizes a great deal for Latvians’ – sure, how much of a corrupt scheme to steal and mismanage money from the budget (like the on-site cleaners earning over 800 lats a month on paper – in 2008), how much of a money sink in general, how much of an ugly white scab on the face of the city it’s been year after year.
But I do realise that the audience are the people who don’t know all this – and don’t need to. And looking from this perspective, I wouldn’t say that the texts there are too much of a failure. There certainly are great things to see in Latvia, so no utter disappointments (and I think most adult people should be at least somewhat immune to advertising pitches, so no exaggerated expectations either) – and more people coming here means more money for us. too.
800 lats a month?! Crap, I wish I’d been a cleaner there!
You’d probably have to be someone’s relative for that. 😉
Must rummage through the roots closet and find a Janis somewhere… 😉
Marrying the right corrupt Latvian official could work, too. 😉
I think I’ll pass 😉
This post is pretty good-for an expat living in Latvia
Love your work 😉
Is this a misplaced comment or are you talking to me?
I think she was talking to me 😉
I assume so – the only pat that I am an ex to is my mother’s uterus. 😉
Ew. 😉
you peasant
Yep, just got sent that by somebody else!
“… in Latvia.” Like Chinese fortune cookies where you always add “… in bed” to the end?
Give me an example…
You will live a long happy life ….
You will be luck this month …
Seek help from strangers …
Ooh, yes, that works! 🙂
and yet, they want you to help make with a yay-Latvia video. that’s funny. ps. how’s that going? i’m way behind on my reading.
I’m Latvia’s darling now 😉 Not.
You should feel the real beauty of Latvia, and not the marketing bullshit for tourists. Unfortunately you failed in seeing the difference. Maybe you didn’t had the right persons around you who could show and let you feel some amazing things. It’s actually more about people who live here, and less about tourists spots.
I have seen Ventas rumba and Niagra falls, and know that? You can’t compare two totally different things. BTW, Niagra falls are overrated too, if you would see them, in reality Niagra falls also are not so impressive as on marketing pictures and videos. Trip to Kuldiga once in a year or two with friends is never about destination. It’s about friendship, “green stops” at various places, landscapes, eating at some random place, feeling great after spending all day in fresh air and memories from previous trips.
I’ve been to Niagara – read a few posts before judging me. Let me guess – about to marry a Latvian woman? Comment again in 5-7 years. Not that I’ll give a shit because I won’t be here any more 😉 Best of luck dude; you’ll need it.
This is your biggest mistake – to assume that there is only one truth – your truth. And then bitch (as someone already said it here) about it. Funny how you have all the time kept complaining about how rude people here are.
P.S. No need to explain that you have learned rude ways from us. I still can tell the difference between grumpyness and real rudeness.
Good for you.
I agree with you on that.
What’s the point of trying to spoon feed your truth then Ilze? Is it because you’re better mannered that you can imply what’s rude and what isn’t? Smart people don’t walk around calling others idiots, if you know what I’m saying. Rudeness is an understatement for someone who can’t take simple criticism and find it necessary to reply to “good for you”. Perhaps dwell on exploring how the English comprehensive works in the first place. Your welcome 😉
For all I know, you and Ilze are the same person. 😉 Anyway, the statistics speak for themselves. I’ve already written a post on this, if Ilze had taken the time to read it. The statistics speak for themselves. And are perfectly evident as you walk around Riga. The city is practically empty – in my four years here, I’ve never seen it this bad. AND it’s Capital of Culture, so there really should be more people this year than any other.
Evie, I don’t see where I have called anyone idiot.
My comment was to Linda’s comment to deni2s. The guy expressed his opinion and got a slap in his face: “about to marry a Latvian woman?” How is that a simple criticism? It is 100% pure rudeness in respect to Latvian women, knowing what Linda thinks of us, and to deni2s – even if he was going to marry a Latvian woman, does it make his opinion invalid?
Why do I feel necessary to reply to something like “good for you”? Maybe because she feels necessary to reply to my observations with “are you from another planet?”
You’re welcome too.
Linda, I’m definitely not Ilze. I wouldn’t want to be 😀
Ha ha! 🙂
Actually, you don’t need to be a flicking social anthropologist like me to understand why Linda made that particular comment to Denis, it’s enough to read her blog and to be aware of what’s going on in general.
Nothing rude about it considering the fact that these opinions are made upon the bare facts. Obvious, or not.
Take a chill pill. And stop reading this blog if you can’t put up with it. Nervous cells do not regenerate, you know. Peace out.
Yeah, I never understand why people keep reading something that annoys them so much 😉 People are strange!
Dear flicking social anthropologist,
may I suggest that you go and explore how the logic works in the first place? (Sorry, I stole part of your quote here.)
And I can do whatever I want with my spare time, thank you very much.
P.S. Have just returned from the centre of the city – yep, full. Of course, not by the standards of Shanghai or London but, then again, the Latvia’s total population has never been larger than that of some metropolis.
Hummmmph … It’s not a quote you stole, it’s my phone’s auto correct.
See, in the countries like this one I’m currently in, even phones have manners and therefore you read what you did not some ghastly nasty word I was trying but oh so miserably failed to get across to you. Never mind. Not that I haven’t tried to explain to you why I said what I did. And I really shouldn’t as you’re apparently gifted with tons of logic. Yet you still failed to get the message. It’s W L and at that I’m licking my fingers clean from Hot Hawaian (it’s Friday night, I’ve got a bad cold and a stinking headache). Kaut kā tā 😉
Hope you feel better – have some Balzams if you can get it. Doesn’t that cure everything? 😉
So in the end it turns out that good manners means opposing someone as a person instead of opposing his or her arguments in a discussion (I’m still musing on deni2s comment here in case you have forgotten). Didn’t know that. Good to learn. Muuzhu dziivo, muuzhu maacies.
o-oh we got some latvian catfight going on here) bring some pillows girls!
Yeah, I’ve bowed out 😉
Pillows might be a bad idea – they could try to smother each other 😉
Thanks Linda 🙂 it’s amazing what a few dozen of jalapeño peppers can do when smothered in tomato sauce and some dough. I’ve got Balzams, had that with chopped chili in, proper did all my pipes in. 😀
To Ilze- ko gribēji, to dabūji! How’s it feel to get the taste of your own medicine? Btw, don’t bother replying, this time it really is rethorical question.
No cat fights ladies (those that are LADIES) 🙂 I just don’t like people thinking they can go throwing shit at others and get away with it. Have your opinion but bloody dig what and who you’re talking about. Which Linda totally does.
Hmmph… I wonder what heath and safety has to say about pillow fights. Are they safer than snot balls? 😉
I think just about everything is safer than snot balls 😉
And hey, this is Latvia! Health and safety is not an issue 😉 Balzams – shudder. I’ve got a couple of mini-bottles to get through before I go 😉
Roka roku mazgaa.
Bitch about it all you want – soon enough you will be physically sick from tamed, orderly Germany and a memory of our little cute stinking shithole will make you cry like a baby. There’s nothing more depressing than walking through a small German town on Friday night – no drunks, no vomit, no police, no nothing that gives meaning to misery called life.
Sounds like the opposite of Dublin too… 😉
Linda, you’re killing me! This post is seriously funny – for Latvia!
Ha ha! I think I have to give half the credit to If you like LV… The best part is that they don’t realise they’re being funny 😉
Riga being designated Cultural Capital Of Europe for 2014. Takes the cake.
(Snigger) 😉
Well, but I think I have seen a “Switzerland” in several other European countries… You will never guess where is the Switzerland of Latvia!
Sigulda!?
Maybe as well. Maybe there is little Switzerland in all regions in Latvia. But in Kurzeme – it’s halfway between Sabile and Kandava.
Hmm, think I’ve passed through that way. Didn’t notice anything particularly ‘Swiss’ – but then Sigulda doesn’t much resemble photos I’ve seen either!
Yeah…. you know I’m from the country that ran the “Where the bloody hell are you” campaign. We can use adjectives, but prefer if some of them are swear words and we like to take an accusatory tone. So I guess we have that last part in common.
Ha ha! I quite liked that campaign actually! VERY Australian! 🙂
I think my favourite, though, was Taiwan’s “exceeding expectations”. We used to like to paraphrase: Taiwan! Not as horrible as you’d think!
Ha ha!
We loved travelling to Taiwan, by the way.
You’re really selling it to me 😉
Yeah, my strength lies more in criticising others’ marketing techniques…
It’s so much easier 😉 And quite enjoyable!
Poor feral kitties!! I guess the Latvians are not into spay-neuter. [Insert joke here.] But when do we get to hear about Berlin?
Super, awesome, amazing, fantastic, brilliant Berlin? 😉 Just over a week now! Posts might be sporadic for the first while though!
Ha, ha! Glad you’re enjoying yourself 🙂
It’s going to be the most super-peppy blog on Germany there ever was – for at least a week 😉
Wow, they even manage to make corn fieds sound exciting 😀
I know! In the corniest possible way 😉
ha ha, ha….in the “corniest possible way” – – funny….
It seemed fitting 😉
And Latvia’s winter is like the Greenland of the European mainland, I assume? Pristine white snowflakes falling in the crisp air…
It can be like that. It can also be dirty, grey and slushy with the risk of being speared by pristine 3-foot long icicles falling from the buildings 😉
Just to remind… 😀
Ha ha! Thank you for that 😉
Perhaps they think that if they say something often enough people will start to believe it!
Versailles of Northern Europe? Isn’t Versailles itself the Versailles of Northern Europe?? 🙂
Ha ha! I’d love to know what the French would make of it all 🙂
I guess they’re like ‘Whatever. Come to our country. Or not. Whatever. You’ll probably like it. Or not. Whatever…’
I much prefer that approach! 🙂
I think you have summed up the French perfectly. 😉
Let’s hope I nail the Germans as well 😉
I have every confidence in you. 🙂
🙂
Amazing, beautiful, gorgeous, welcoming and only 813 years old? Yes, your guess is correct – it’s the breathtaking city of Riga. (Keels over, clawing at eyes…)
There’s a thing we can say for sure – we, Latvians, really love our wildlife. From amazing lakes and forests to astonishing butterflies in all colours and sizes. (Silently weeps.)
Im like WHAT? even if latvia was that great… isnt this tyle of praise incredibly cheesy? not sure if I would want to describe my own country like that in a travel guide. didnt they hire an english speaking editor for this? you know to make the whole thing sound a little more realistic? with the amount of british sexpats in the country they must have found at least one.
Ha ha! I don’t know if they can write 😉
Yeah, whenever someone visits Ireland, I tell them I hope they have a nice time and silently pray that the Irish don’t do anything too weird. Then they tell me afterwards that they had a wonderful time and I breathe a sigh of relief 😉
And cheesy is being kind I think 🙂
The scary thing is that while I was reading the superlatives, I kept thinking, “are we sure I didnt write this and just forgot?!”
Also, are we going to that palace? :-DDDDD
Also-also, I have 48 hrs and like… NOTHING is done for this trip. I still dont have Euros, clothing list, bus to Tallinn, ferry to Helsinki, tickets printed…
Um, you might want to start organising some of that! You can print tickets here – just BUY THEM!
And no, we are not going to that palace!
The buying thing doesnt work!
http://www.luxexpress.eu/en
http://legacy.ecolines.net/index.php?l=2
Have to make sure you get out of here safely… 😉
Well, in fairness, if they didn’t oversell it, who would go there? 🙂
Fair point. Few enough people come here even when they do oversell it! 🙂
I was out with Yummy Janis yesterday – he couldn’t get over how empty Riga was…
Imagine that. 🙂
Crazy, right? 😉
NancyTex, I was out Friday lunch-time and there were literally heards of tourists roaming the streets. And literally every table but one at the cafe I visited to have my lunch was taken by foreigners. And that was just one Friday. I’ve experienced the same all summer long. Imagine that. This Linda chick is not very accurate often times.
If it weren’t for the tourists, the place would be completely deserted. As opposed to semi-deserted.
Here it comes again – you gain ypour popularity by simply mocking people and keep thinking of yourself as a funny and smart blogger.
Sigh…
Yes, sigh …
OK, willing to give it another go, today I was on a walking tour around old town. Apart from various walking tours, it was mostly deserted. And the main language I heard from people NOT on the tourist trail was not Latvian, but Russian…
🙂
So what? It is two of your days against several of mine. But, I guess, as this is your blog you win, right?
Oh, and you finally have noticed that at least half of Riga’s population is Russian!
Yeah, 2 days. Seriously, what planet are you on?
You said two days, I said all summer long.
I also said – your blog you win. I haven’t seen you accept a viewpoint different from yours yet.
You think I’ve been living in a cave for the rest of the summer?
You think I have?
I spent a week in Riga in August, and, if I’m perfectly honest, I was shocked to see how empty it was. Even the most popular places seemed to be half-empty. Net migration data doesn’t look as bad as the real situation, though. Go figure!
Thank you Lasma. And no, I didn’t ask/pay her to comment.
I’m finding it hard to think of a more self-satisfied comment than “We like to say that the journey is more important than the destination (except when your destination is Latvia, of course).” WOW!
I know, right? I vomited a little in my mouth while reading it! 🙂 Of course…
Is it wrong that I love it? BECAUSE I LOVE IT!
I take it that’s a rhetorical question.
Latvians make their country sounds like a Disney movie clip – you know the one where sleeping beauty is dancing down the forest road with all the birds and animas smiling and singing her praises.
Ha ha! Great comparison! And so true 🙂 The Latvians will eat this shit up – it’s got trees and astonishing birds and everything 🙂
Ha! That was exactly the clip I was thinking of – you’re a mind reader Linda. And I had forgotten that it actually has a glimpse (just a teaser) of the Latvian Versailles at the end as well. Marvellous!
Lasit domas 😉 (I read thoughts, in Latvian.)
Oh as an aside Linda, I posted a guest post over at Cordelia’s Mom yesterday http://cordeliasmomstill.com/2014/09/04/red-stars-guest-post-by-paul-curran/comment-page-1/#comment-3469 I would be honored if you had the time to drop by and have a read. Thank you very much.
Loved it! Commented on the post as well 🙂
Thank you so very much Linda!
Of course! No problem!
Major overuse of “amazing” – it begins to lose it’s impact on the 10th “amazing” description. At least they’re legible, though, I get so frustrated at the English on the Lithuanian Tourist website. It just looks so lazy – I imagine first time visitors must think the rest of the country is as disinterested in providing a good experience for visitors. I want to scream at them (and fix it) because it’s a wonderful place to visit and I want people to come!
Before coming to Lithuania, try to answer to yourself what you wish to see and do here.
Hear how the land is praised by singing birds. (Um, what!?)
You will see that the condition of roads is truly good here for travelling by car and that a train or a bus can take you to practically any place of the country.
EEK! 🙂
Exactamungo. Who in their right mind would come here after reading that?!
Comedians looking for material? 😉
Might visit!
Do! Latvia is really lovely – for Latvia 😉
But you won’t be there!
Another selling point 😉
!!!!! They might add that to the site!
Ha ha! I thought that just after I wrote it! 🙂
“The wonder our blogger, Expat eye on Latvia, is a modern myth. This blogger was thought to have once dwelt in a cave outside Riga in the early 21st century but no trace of her can be found.
“Discover more amazing Latvian myths and legends when you visit our delightful country. “
BRILLIANT! 🙂
Interesting, as a lot of Russians tend to undersell things. “Saint Basil’s? It’s just a cathedral” while foreigners fangirl all over themselves. But now I’m off to find the uber-peppy ‘Welcome to Russia!!!!1’ site. There’s got to be one.
(I already regret looking.)
Ha ha! Post a link if you find it! I just can’t imagine an uber-peppy Russian!
**Jumps up and down waving both hands in the air**
Sorry, I moved to Berlin this morning. Have fun in Riga 😉
No soup for you
If it’s cold beetroot soup, you can keep it 😉
HA HA HA! (struggles hard to get back on a chair after hard fall on the ground) Now that I’m back i can totally agree that Latvia almost always oversell their places of attraction and I’m speaking from my own experience here. On the other hand, their sales pitch do work for me, and I at least do FIND all of places of interest there is (not unlike some POI in Lithuania *deep sigh*). Though some of those POIs turned out just meh, and some were even nice or great IMO, in the end I did visit them, so go figure I’m yet another victim of successful ‘visit this unique place’ sales pitch. Rundale for example was great and if compared to Lithuanian ‘Versailles’ Rokiškis manor, it was so much more impressive and bigger. Pape Nature Park was, quite unfortunately, a complete bummer since Latvians forgot to mention that in order to enjoy most of park’s attractions you’re supposed to drive safari style on a real dirt track. Same goes with Kuldiga, if you read about town’s attraction online you’re learn about it’s awesome Old Town (which is OK), an old bridge (also really nice), a widest waterfall is Estern Europe Venta’s Rumba (really? widest? OK, but why FORGET to mention is 10 cm high or something. So in the end just so-so POI).
But as I say, Latvians at least took the trouble to make sure their all real and questionable POIs are easily found by tourists. While in my own country I sometimes really struggle to get any real directions or where to find some of the countries POIs… 😦
Lithuania has a ‘Versailles’ too!? Sheesh – seems like there are Versailles Palaces everywhere! Kuldiga was one of the few places here that lived up to expectations for me actually!
Oh, yeah, we do have a Versailles over here too. Though our own is so small and laughable even on comparison to Rundale, that I really can’t see why the two are compared. Rokiškis manor is one of a few really well maintained palaces in Lithuania, it has a nice small park and all, but it’s just as much to Versailles as your Riga’s apartment is to a some top notch Pent House apartment is some super expensive place.
Must agree about Kuldiga, it was a really nice place with beautiful Old Town and all, and I loved sand caves located near the town, but I just could not get the deal behind advertising the Venta’s Rumba as such a big deal. THAT waterfall was quite laughable. Weren’t it advertised as widest, I might have let it slide
I thought it was a beautiful spot, but yes, if you’re expecting Niagara, then you’re in for a let-down 😉 Appreciate it for what it is and you’ll be fine!
Just Googled Rokiškis manor – looks very nice!
I was expecting, after reading all the raves about the waterfall, the Venta’s Rumba to be really big, so actually seeing it sent all of us into uncontrolled laugher. And for a year or so after that visit to kuldiga it has become our own private joke and anything that wasn’t as great as expected was referred to as Rumba 😀
Rokiškis is a really beautiful place, but why it’s compared to Versailles I’ll never know. It could be successfully advertised for what it is – the best preserved and maintained palace in Lithuania, with most (if not all) of it’s buildings intact to the day. Must be some inferiority complex or something >_<
Small country syndrome – like men with small dicks who buy Porsches 😉
Rokiškis manor looks not much bigger than my primary school – Suntazu pils 🙂
Ha ha! Wow, that’s a pretty impressive primary school! 🙂
We really liked Rundale Palace…. but not sure if it is the Versailles of Northern Europe 😉
That stork nest out front makes it even more special 🙂
Yeah, I liked it – I haven’t been to Versailles though so can’t compare. I did meet a German guy at the bus-stop afterwards – he was like ‘The Versailles of Latvia? Pah!’ 😉
Rundown Palace…?
Ha ha! It’s actually worth a visit – if you’re already in Latvia 😉
Looks nice in the picture. But if I read once more that something is the “Venice of XXX” etc… LAME!!!
I know – that drives me nuts! Just sell a place on its own merits!
“Venice of XXX” I would like to know who came up with this terrible trend in Latvia.
I don’t think it’s just a Latvian thing but I’m not a fan either!